The never ending mommy brain 

I guess it is hormones or the newness of taking care of another human life that burns your brain cells and makes things foggy. Whatever it is, most women can relate. You can go from sharp as a tack to Jell-o brain real quick. Multitasking is a must but can almost seem impossible at times. With a huge load to carry it’s almost impossible to remember it all. Last summer, as I turned 30, I had another new chapter to add to my book. I was diagnosed with ADHD. I visited my primary care physician and told her I was having trouble remembering simple things. She referred me to a neuropsychologist where I described what was going on. “It just seems like the fog that happened after the baby never went away.”  

I had never recalled feeling so foggy before. I started school at second grade. From the first day I was a gifted student and took gifted classes throughout high school. I had no challenges or delays when it came to learning or retaining information. I may have been a bit lazy in school but I never had to work very hard to make decent grades. The same would apply to undergrad and grad school. But being a mom and having a career was kicking my ass! 

My doctor ran some tests. They were long and brutal. After the screening I knew what I was dealing with. I had seen the same things in my students and had to suggest similar tests to their parents. The doctor, however, was very shocked. “I’ve never diagnosed someone with ADHD before at your age,” she said. 

She explained the results of my tests. My ability to retain information from one minute to the next was poor. I was impulsive (that would explain some really bad things I did in college). I could probably use some help in these areas so she gave me a prescription for some medicine. 

It was quite ironic that as a school counselor at the time that I would be administering my own medication before doing the same for my students. Nonetheless, I took the advice and was glad to have an answer to my permanent baby brain situation. And looking back, I see where I was struggling with this all along. My attention span has always sucked. I often daydreamed and to this day have trouble watching a movie from beginning to end. Studying was a joke; all nighters in my dorm usually consisted of lots of coffee, jokes, and fashion shows. 

I’m glad that I know it’s never too late to learn something new. Though I enjoyed goofing around with my friends on those late nights, I just don’t have that much time to waste anymore. And although I don’t really care too much for movies, I need to be able to complete a lengthy task. So I’m grateful that my journey into motherhood taught me something new about myself. 

  My son, Eli, made this. I think this is a good representation of what is happening in my brain on most days. 


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