This is for mature audiences only!
So, I can’t believe I am writing this, but someone told me I should share my viewpoint on this. Here it goes!
Over time women learn so much about what not to do when it comes to sex. Our parents teach us just not to do it; please just remain a virgin forever. Relationship experts tell us to hold onto the cookie as long as we can in order to get the man we want. There are so many versions of this rule–90 days, 3 dates, etc. Our friends will judge us with mouths wide open if we give it up on the first date. The church says to wait until marriage. Basically, everyone and everything says just say no unless you are in a committed relationship.
Many women don’t talk about their own views because there are only two ways to be seen. Either you are the wholesome, virgin (or virgin-like) woman who holds onto her cookie with a death grip and will only hand it out if there is a ring in her near future. Or you are a hoe, a THOT, fast, have no morals and will give it out like free samples at the grocery store. Personally, I do not agree.
I believe every woman should create their own rules and shouldn’t be extreme one way or the other. Having sex is an intimate and vulnerable thing. I think it is important to ask yourself how comfortable you feel going into the situation. Do you feel safe? Will that person respect your body and boundaries? Is he going to be engaged and will you be satisfied with the decision you made? Ultimately, you can’t control someone else and what they do, but when an experience is over, you should feel good about the decision you made.
Creating rules to control an outcome may have you feeling disappointed. You may ask yourself if your decision to give it up too early or too late caused the relationship to end. But if there is anything I have learned is people will lie and scheme to get what they want. So, you can’t let what someone says or does influence your decision. You just gotta stay true to yourself! If it takes you a long time to get comfortable enough to be intimate then take your time. If you like to test the product before you invest, then do that. And if your relationship doesn’t work out because the other person was not pleased with your decision or judged you–then you are better off without that jerk. Besides, I don’t think it is a good idea to make anyone do anything and especially not marry you. Wouldn’t you like to walk down the aisle knowing you didn’t have to hold the man standing at the other end at gunpoint? I’m just saying.
The moral of this post is the cookie is yours. Regardless of who you choose to share it with, you are the proud owner. And you only get one so use it wisely 🙂